It was on one level quite the usual autumn here in the Meadowplace. Pumpkins, berries, cosy times. Finding that someone had raised an Ebenezer long ago in their home, as I endeavour badly to do here! There have been exceptional moments too- the small matter of a little hurricane for one. On that other level of things outside the norm, I was so glad to read MK's recent post about how the reality behind Blogland can bely its pictures. It's been a tough season here in many respects. When I walk out of our friends' new house to see that old Ebenezer sign it does me good to remember that thus far God has indeed helped us. I pray that He is helping you too x
I finished an anthology of Emily Dickinson last week. My! That is a hard read. Possibly one of my hardest. I did, however, love the idea of ubi sunt literature. Writing that voices our questions over where the values of the past are, where the things that we have lost are. This articulated for me all my approaching fifty angst- where are the things that I had/did/aspired to/achieved? Then, thankfully, I had a little Epiphany. What if I asked not,"Where are?" but, "What now?" What if I did do not very much with my education, my thin body, my opportunities to do this, that and the other? What now? What next?
Yesterday Mattman and I climbed one of our local hills. He wanted to keep on going and walk down the other side. I think he could have walked all day. My forward-facing teenage man and a clear, cold November dusk-coming sky. Not so much ubi sunt, as ubi ergo!
4 comments:
It's so nice to hear from you, Mags!
I often think about what we are losing without realizing what is slipping away. That is why I like to read Larkrise to Candleford.
About the shawl, I think the yarn store lady said 29 in circulars are long enough for any shawl. The one I finished is supposed to be a crescent but I forgot some parts. It's okay. It is easy to drape.
Yes, the 50's are wonderful. They are!
I agree, the 50's are pretty good. And God always has a plan. The enemy wants us to keep whacking ourselves over the head about what we haven't done, but as long as we have breath, God can use us! Stay open to Him (she preached to herself)!
I love your musings. It seems nearly every day I go through a similar progression of thoughts, as I face my contingency, the reality that I am still alive on the earth (my Ebenezer!) and my failure to be all that I might have been, up to this moment. But all that is a great lead-in to the next moment, as it opens us up a large space for God's loving grace and mercy.
Love to you, Dear Mags!
These questions that rattle around in our minds! We can hardly help them. As with most humans, as I age I find myself thinking more about the past, and thinking much about family and esp. my parents. As the years ahead lessen, I find myself thinking longingly of heaven, where there will be no ominous clock ticking away. Sounds like you've had a very thoughtful autumn, Mags. May God bless it.
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